Who am I?

Yesterday I turned down a job opportunity.  To be exact, my husband and I turned down the opportunity to minister in a new state, hundreds of miles away from where we are living now.  It’s something we have been praying about since February, and yesterday we officially said no.  I knew it was the right decision.  He knew it was the right decision.  And although I suppose I should have expected it, I wasn’t prepared for the attack that came at me after the phone call ended.

Backstory time…

As 2019 rolled around, my husband and I knew that God was preparing us for something new.  We knew that He was preparing us for the next thing.  When we got the invitation for this ministry opportunity, we couldn’t help but wonder if this was the new thing.  There was a nagging feeling; however, that it was not.  If it wasn’t, though, what was?  So, we kept hanging on, undecided.

Meanwhile, I was sick, sick, and sicker.  Currently, I am bed-ridden…well, couch-bound, I’d say, since I am spending my days on the couch instead of the bed.  haha.  I will be having surgery in 7 days (yes, I’m counting down), but until then, I am trapped, unproductive, not participating in life the way I would like, and in pain.

So, here I am, not attending church, not being “productive”, and not contributing to the world in the ways I would like to, and now I’m turning down an amazing opportunity in ministry.  I live to minister.  I love to minister.  I desire to minister.  And now I’m trapped on a couch and saying, “No, thank you,” to this opportunity before me.  What is happening?  Who am I?

Who am I?  That’s the exact question the enemy wanted to attack me with when the phone call ended.  If you aren’t going to go minister to these people; if you aren’t going to take this chance, then who are you?  If you are just going to be lying around on the couch doing nothing, then how can God even use you?  What difference can you even make?

This, my dear friends, is why we need to know what God has said about us.  10 days ago, I got a confirmation that the Lord was calling me to a higher level.  Just because I’ve said no to that specific chance does not mean it’s the end of my story.  It means God has a different plan for me.  There is a different assignment under my name and once I am healed and my training is complete, He will make sure that I am placed there.

I cannot allow the enemy to take captive my thoughts and pull me down now…not after all this time.  The Word tells me that I am to demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of Christ, and to take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.  It’s up to me to take captive my own thoughts and make them obedient to Christ.  Anything that tries to set itself against my knowledge of Christ has got to go!

So, today, if you feel yourself having any thoughts like me:  Who am I?  What difference can I make anyway?  How can God even use me?  Then I hope you will demolish those arguments, as well, and take captive your thoughts, too!  Satan wants to steal our hopes, destroy our ministries, and kill the people we love by having us neglect to do the ministry we were meant to do because we feel too crippled to do it.

Even from this couch, I can minister.  Even from where you are, so can you.  Take those thoughts captive and let’s get busy!  There are too many souls at stake and there are assignments out there with OUR names on them!

Called,

jamie

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Be usable during the trials

Laying block with oxygen.  What’s stopping you??

My father was bed-ridden for several years, and then weak for several more.  Why not healed?  One night the Lord spoke to him and told him to build a house for someone he’d never met.  He wasn’t able to in his own strength.  The Lord also spoke to the pastor at his church and told him to give away a substantial amount of money.  He spoke to another man and told him to donate land.  Person after person stepped forward, obeying God’s leading, and a home was built for a family from start to finish in 40 days.

My dad’s weakness enabled God’s strength to be perfected and manifested.  Might I suggest that before that time my dad may have been too busy to hear the voice of God in that way?  Or too busy to take the time to help organize and attend a project of that magnitude?

God uses us all in different ways and for different reasons.  We just have to be available for His purposes and plans.

“Go, for he is a chosen vessel of Mine to bear My name before Gentiles, kings, and the children of Israel.  For I will show him how many things he must suffer for My name’s sake.”

These are the words the Lord spoke to the disciple that was sent to put his hands on Saul (who would later become the apostle Paul–missionary to thousands), when he would regain his sight.  And yet, Paul always had what he called a “thorn in his flesh” that God never removed.  He said he prayed for the Lord to remove it and the Lord told him no.  The Lord told Paul that His grace was sufficient and that His strength would be made perfect in Paul’s weakness.

It’s interesting that when Paul was called into ministry he was shown how many things he would suffer God’s name’s sake, and how the Lord told Paul no, and how now, in 2019 we think our Christian walk should be about our comfort, our happiness, our delight….about us.  When did things get so twisted?

Christianity just simply isn’t about us.  It is about the Lord.  It says about Saul, “Immediately he preached the Christ in synagogues, that He is the Son of God.”  He began immediately doing what he was called to do, and people immediately began wanting to kill him.  (You can find all of this in Acts 9)

Job, in his agony and suffering repented and humbled himself before the Lord…before he was ever healed or restored.  Then, in Job 42:8, the Lord put Job in charge of praying for his friends.  In his state, he was best suited to pray for his friends.  He was the one God called to pray, to work, to do His will.  And then, praise God for him, He was restored.

Sickness and trials are not a problem that keeps us from fulfilling God’s call in our lives.  It may hinder us from doing all the things we want.  I know I still have times when I can’t sing, can’t raise my hands in worship, can’t teach or even attend church; however, if we are still alive then God can still use us.

Ask God how He can use your vessel.  When He gives you an opportunity, don’t let it pass you by.  Don’t fear that you’re too weak.  In your weakness, His strength is made perfect.  It has been proven over and over:  see David and Goliath, Noah and the Ark, 3 Hebrew’s in the furnace, on and on.  God will give you all that you need to complete the task He sets before you.

Be available just as you are,

jamie

 

On their behalf

In yesterday’s blog, I talked about how we should show love to those in pain and trials and not offer judgment and accusations, in the way that Job’s friends did.  I also mentioned how we can pray for those we know who are in pain.  I wanted to talk more on that today, because that is probably the one of the most important things we can do, and yet sometimes we neglect it.

In Matthew 8:5-13, we find the record of Jesus and a centurion.  The centurion’s servant was lying at home paralyzed, and in terribly agony and pain.  (Some versions of the Bible say he was dreadfully tormented.  yikes!)

The centurion came to Jesus, asking Him to heal his servant.  This story is powerful in so many ways.  If you haven’t read it in a while, or ever, I encourage you to read it.

The centurion knew, and acknowledged that Jesus was powerful enough that He need only speak the word and His servant could be healed.  He didn’t even require that Jesus come to his home to do it.  He knew Jesus could do it from right where He stood.

And this is the part I want to stress:  The centurion’s faith alone was great enough that Jesus marveled at it.  (vs. 10)  The servant’s faith was never called into question.  Perhaps his was just as great.  Maybe it wasn’t.  All we know is that the centurion interceded on the servant’s behalf, and that the servant was healed that same hour.

We are called not only to love our neighbors as ourselves, but also to pray for one another that we may be healed. (Ja. 5:16)

Unless they’ve told us it’s the case, we never need to tell someone that they aren’t being healed or delivered from their trial because their faith isn’t strong enough.  We need to intercede on their behalf.  We never need to accuse someone of being sick or in trials due to sin, but we need to pray for them.

What the centurion did on his servant’s behalf is an excellent example of how we should live.  Job, as well, before his children died, offered up offerings to the Lord just in case his children had sinned.  These are excellent examples of people who are going to the Lord on behalf of others.

Not everyone will be healed.  Is that hard to hear?  God has plans for people that sometimes do not include healing, because He uses people in so many different ways.  But that should never stop us from asking.  We do not know His plans.  We need to ask.  We need to seek.

Above all, though, what we need to seek, for ourselves and for each other, is a relationship with Him, which will keep us calm in every storm, every trial, and every sickness.

Let’s be interceders and never accusers,

jamie

Oh, such pain!

I’m reading the conversations between Job and his friends right now in the book of Job.  It’s so uncomfortable for me because I have scars from comments people have made to me during my own health issues the last few years…even while I was down at the altar seeking God’s face.

Job asked his friends why they were tormenting him with their accusations and insults.  I know Job was a man, but I have to wonder if he cried because of what they said?  I usually just cry.  ha!

I’m not sure what it is about health issues or major trials that opens up the doorway to make others think they should step in and offer up judgment instead of encouragement, but it’s sad.  When someone is going through pain and trials, the last thing they need is added pain.

Sickness in someone’s life does not automatically mean they’ve sinned or haven’t asked, in faith, to be healed.  Trials in someone’s life does not mean they have not been generous to the poor or have angered God.

What do those in pain or those in the midst of a trial need?  They need love.  They need compassion.  They need an ear to listen.  They need prayer.  If you know specifically of sin in their life, you can offer help, but if you don’t, then don’t accuse.  People who are hurting need comfort.  They need a friend.

Take them a meal.  Babysit their kids or pay for someone else to do it.  Pay for someone to clean their house for them.  Go sit with them when they can’t get out of bed.  Pray with them.  Give them a hug.  Wash their car.  Offer to do something else you know will bless them.  Do something to bless them, but don’t add to their pain.

I am so blessed by Job.  He did curse the day he was born…that’s understandable, since he was in immense pain…but he was never so discouraged that he allowed his friends to turn mind away from trusting God.

For any Christian in pain, that’s critical.  We can’t turn our hearts away from trusting in God.  As Christians, we cannot be the ones to cause pain.  Our lives are supposed to represent God’s love.  If God’s love looks like judgment and accusations, especially in a trial or painful time in someone’s life, it will make it so hard for them to trust in Him.

As Christians, it is imperative that we operate in love, encouragement, and in prayer.  Jesus said we should love the Lord our God with all our heart all our soul all our strength and all our mind; and we should love our neighbor as ourselves.  What if you were the one in pain?  What would you want to hear?  What if you were in that trial?  What would you need?

We must go and do likewise,

jamie

 

Seeking faith with the wise

Pr. 13:20:  “He who walks with wise men will be wise, but the companion of fools will be destroyed.”

So, yesterday I admitted that God corrected me for doubting.  Am I alone in that?  I have asked God to increase my faith.  Maybe you guys are already full of faith.

See, it’s not that I doubt that God is able.  My goodness, if He can split the Red Sea, He can heal me.  If He can send so much fire from heaven that it burns up Elijah’s offering, including the wood, the rock altar, the ground around the altar, and the water in the ditch, He can do anything!  I believe He is the God of the Bible.

I believe He is the God that led David’s stone into Goliath’s forehead.  I believe He is the God who kept Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego from even smelling of smoke when they were thrown into the fiery furnace.  I believe He is the same God who kept Paul from even getting sick when he was bit by a poisonous viper.

I believe He is the same God today that He was even then!

The trouble I have had in the past is when it comes to His will.  Does He desire for me to be healed?  Paul prayed 3 times to be delivered from the thorn in his flesh and the Lord told him no.  The Lord told Him that His grace was sufficient and that His strength was made perfect in weakness.

What I have found since 2012, when I first became afflicted, is that God’s grace is indeed sufficient.  And although I fought it so many times at first, His strength is made most perfect in my weakness.  I can honestly say that I could not have been brought to the place I am with God had I not gone through what I have.  I can truly say, “what the enemy meant for evil, God has used for good.”

Does that mean that I can’t ask for healing and have the faith that it’s still possible?  No.  And in my Bible study of faith what better place to start than Heb. 11?  I want to walk with wise men, like this proverb says.  I want to walk with the hall-of-famers of faith!  I’m going to start there and keep walking.  I’m going to keep believing and keep increasing in my faith.

Now faith is the confidence in what we hope for…

jamie

Correction from the Lord

Pr. 12:1:  “Whoever loves instruction loves knowledge, but he who hates correction is stupid.”

We went to a revival service last night and the Lord corrected me.  As the evangelist was giving his altar call, when I should have been preparing to come down and pray for healing, I was doubting.  The Holy Spirit gave out a message and literally asked me, “After all this, are you still doubting?  After all you’ve seen me do?”  Tears poured down my face.  He was right.

I have no problem worshiping the King of Kings and Great I Am.  Simply because of who He is, He is worthy.  Just because He is Lord, He deserves my praise.  But sometimes I still struggle with doubt.  Does He want healing for me?  Is that His will?  I haven’t asked Him for healing in a while because I decided to be content with the life I’ve been given.  However, as I went to the altar last night, asking for forgiveness for my doubt, I also asked the Lord to increase my faith.  I asked the Lord to have mercy on me and heal me.  I am believing He has heard my prayer and am placing my faith in His power!

I am going to begin studying my Bible specifically for faith and seeking an increase in my faith, so for today I am going to remind myself of some of the faithful ways the Lord has shown Himself Lord over my life.

  • He spared me from being raped by a boyfriend when I was 15
  • He saved me from suicide a few months later
  • He has always given me a job when I needed one
  • He introduced me to the most unlikely man who would end up being my godly husband, at the most unexpected moment in my life.  That man brought me back to the Lord.
  • When I was 23 and low on money, he sent me a co-worker with a box of food, complete with homemade Christmas goodies  🙂
  • When my father was bedridden with a terminal diagnosis, the Lord delivered him and got him out of that bed to continue on with life
  • He delivered my father from prostate cancer
  • He delivered my sister-in-law from breast cancer
  • As my husband and I have paid our tithes throughout our marriage, the Lord has always met our needs
  • He has provided clothing for our children through friends throughout most of their childhood
  • He saved me and then didn’t give up on me when I went astray.  He has forgiven me over and over again
  • He gave me 2 beautiful children that I never deserved, through His grace and His mercy.

This is just the tip of the iceburg of the many ways the Lord has shown Himself faithful over to me over the years.  He is the same God today that He was yesterday.  He will be the same God tomorrow!  I will continue to remember all that He has done for my family and me as I think of His goodness.

Increasing in faith,

jamie

Giving glory to God!

It occurs to me that I’ve been remiss in giving God glory.  Let’s remedy that.

If you’ve followed me for a while, you know that I began having undiagnosable health issues in 2012.  The Lord has brought me a long, long way since then and He deserves to be praised!

In the winter of 2016, the Lord led me to a possible diagnosis.  It took a simple pill to test my theory and I found a Dr. who was willing to give it a try.  Within 2 weeks, my constant, chronic pain was gone.  For the first time in almost 5 years, I could barely detect it!  Miracle!!!

I could now function at an almost normal level.  Just amazing!!!!

Unfortunately, the pill that took away my chronic pain increases my migraines about 10-fold, so for the last year or so I have been working with my neurologist to regulate those.  I think we’ve finally found a good balance.

I’m not trying to bore you with medical details, as I know everyone has their own.  I just want to give God the glory for what He has done for me!

All the prayers that went up for me during the years I was in pain have been answered!  All of the faith that people had in God for me was not in vain!  All of the trust I had in Him as my Healer, Provider, and Deliverer is well-placed!

The answers to our prayers don’t always look the way we envision them.  The answers don’t always come when we hope.  This does not mean God has left us or isn’t working in our lives.  God has plans that we don’t always know or understand.

I can absolutely say to you today that I am much more confident in Him as my Provider than in any other time in my history.  I can say with certainty that He most certainly uses our weaknesses to perfect His strength.  I know that the woman I am today is directly related to the pain I’ve experienced, and the trust I’ve had to place in my Lord.

I’ve also been able to be used in new ways, due to my experience.  I am much more alert to others’ pain, and I can relate in a way that some cannot.  I know what to say and what is best left unsaid.  God is able to use me in a unique way in the lives of His children now, and for that I can honestly say I am grateful.

So, thank You, Lord, for healing me.  Thank You, also, for the lessons I’ve learned along the way.  And, as Ps. 119:71 says, “It is good for me that I have been afflicted, that I may learn Your statutes.”  I love that I know Your Word better today than I have ever before.  I love You, my Lord and my God!

jamie